Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Dance Recital

Yesterday was Kaylie's Dance Recital and believe it or not this was the most calm part of our day yesterday! Why is it that everything that can go wrong, always has to happen at the worst possible time?

~Long story short....I got to bed late the night before (working of course). Then Aaron kept me up until 3 am. And Kaylie woke me up around 4 am complaining about the glow in the dark stars on her ceiling...she wanted me to turn them off. Well turns out the power went out and her night light went off and she really wanted me to turn it back on. The next morning the power was still out, and I got to have the wonderful experience of being the first person to report the outage... I never knew it could be such a pain to convince the power company that my power was really out. To make matters worse... it took them about 6 hours to get it back on after I had finally convinced them it was out. So... no work got done, and it was a huge rush when it came back on to shower, get ready and get Kaylie ready for her recital... all because I didn't want to rush her.... she just doesn't do well when being pushed.

~But all turned out just in time for her recital...and she sure looked cute...not to mention she loves getting her hair done and the makeup! This is why I love having a girl... to doll her up! And yes.... it is all her natural hair....(I was only asked a dozen times last night). She gets the curse from me!
~Started out so cute... which makes me so happy after a whole year of dance lessons and her cooperating only about 50% of the time.
~This was her favorite dance..."Locomotion" (Train dance) and so she was pretty excited to show off her skills....she's a definite ham.
Cute train part.
~All until....her tap shoe came untied....and then she spent the rest of the dance trying to tie it and dance at the same time (this happened a few times in rehearsals...and I just told her to keep on dancing and pretend it was tied). Everyone was laughing so hard....I'm just glad she didn't burst into tears about it (she usually would) but she was a super good sport and at least she took my advice and finished the dance. The poor girl next to her in the sweatshirt cried the whole it didn't make me feel so bad. But after the recital several people came up to me and told me how cute it was that she was trying to tie her shoe.
~Award time! She did her best for a balloon, cardboard crown and a laffy taffy. Hey whatever keeps them motivated!
~Cheesy Girl! I'm so proud of her...and I can't believe she is getting so big so fast!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

To "C" or not to "C"

Another Deep Perspective from a super pregnant woman... and worth the read again!
~One of the first and lingering possibilities of this pregnancy that I can't seem to get away from is the horrible, the awful, the unimaginable lingering possibility of ( I dare say it???) it's the "C" word, that horrible word that many pregnant women dread...a C-Section.

(Insert Scream Here). j/k ;)

~Yes, there is the 50% chance (if not, much higher % chance) that I could have a C-Section. Do I want a C-Section....I'd prefer to pass, but if Baby A (closest baby to the birth canal) isn't head down.... or if something goes wrong and one or both babies or even my own health is in danger, I may have no choice but to have a C-Section. This is something that immediately terrified me once I found out we were expecting twins...."please, no....not a C-Section!!!!" But it didn't take long for me to realize that like most things in my life I HAVE NO CONTROL over this pending situation, I just have to sit, wait and pray that I get these two girls here safe and sound...and if a C-Section is required to do so.... so be it....personally I am so grateful that there is even another option... just in case.

~I love all the well meaning friends, family and strangers that throw their input in on this "C" word matter. They all feel inclined to share their opinions. Unfortunately, most are extremely negative. I am so tired of the horror stories about C-Sections. As if scaring me enough will prevent me from having to have a C-Section.

~Then they have to stress to me on every level how and why I can't have a C-section. "Tell your Doctor, that you just WILL NOT have a C-section." "Find a Doctor, that whatever happens, will not let it result in a C-section." And the list continues. When I try to give them a little more perspective on what all the possibilities of a C-Section with twins are... like for instance that it is humanly impossible to deliver a baby back first, and that you may be able to flip a breech baby around before delivery (I was breech and was flipped) but you can't flip a baby when there are two... they look at me like I am about to jump off a cliff... and repeat to me again all the reasons I can't have a C-Section (as if I didn't hear them the first time). I usually let the conversation die at that point...just because it's not worth the fight. But I have wondered if these people will look at me as some sort of failure in the case that I do have a C-Section. Will they look down on me? Will they feel like I have given into the dark side? Will I be kicked out the Vaginal Delivery Club??? (Sorry...I had to throw that last one in there). ;)

As I have reflected on this pending situation... it comes right down to one thing...another "C" word...."Control".

~I am a self-diagnosed control freak...I love to plan EVERYTHING! I love to control EVERYTHING!!! And like everything else in my life...I would love to control whether or not I have a C-Section....but it is not for me to control. Heavenly Father has taught me this lesson very clearly over the past few years...I am not in control! If I was, my husband would not be going blind, he would not be out of a job, I would have all our student loans paid off, Oprah would buy my business and give me 10% royalties for the rest of my life, I would be living in my dream house. I would have had a personal trainer well before this pregnancy. I will have a flawless pregnancy, perfect delivery and two beautiful, healthy girls that sleep on command and spend the rest of their time laughing and being perfectly pleasant.

Reality Check....HOW BORING WOULD THAT BE???

~It would be so boring... life would be so have nothing to do but live the life you expected. Imagine reading a book or watching a movie, where you knew everything that would happen next. Imagine there is no conflict, struggle or problems in this book/movie... my bet is that after the first 10 pages/minutes you would stop reading/watching it because there would be no plot. Hence the reason my second "C" word "Control", it is so over rated.

~Now to finish....I will introduce my third "C" word...(okay so it doesn't start with a "C" but stick with me here) It is "Seeing". Some people say "Seeing is believing." That may be true in many instances but I have found the opposite to be more true..."Believing is Seeing". What??? Another beautiful lesson that Heavenly Father has taught me is to Believe and then I will See things from His perspective. And this is hard....very hard. I was prompted to start my little shop, so I did, I just believed that it was what Heavenly Father wanted me to do....why? I didn't know at the time, but I am starting to see it now (a year a half later). I started my shop with $38, and I had no idea at the time that I had created an income and career for my husband and myself now. Even though it would have been nice to see that my investment (which was quite the sacrifice at the time) would result in an answer to our prayers, I'm grateful for all the stress, sweat, tears and prayers that it took in order for me to "See". I learned from this experience how important it is to Believe first and then you will See! I learned that Heavenly Father sees everything....and will only help us to see if we just trust him enough to give up our useless urge to "Control" and just Believe.

~My whole shop could die tomorrow, and we could go bankrupt. But I'm so glad I can't see that...because I Believe that Heavenly Father gave us these situations to teach us how to Believe and eventually how to See! And for the first time in my life I can really See what seeing is all about!

~So to see or not to see, to control or not to control, to have a C-Section or not to have a C-Section...they are all in one odd way the same. And I choose to Believe that whatever Heavenly Father gives me is the best for me. So despite any drama, or suspense I am Believing that the kind of a book or movie my life will end up being, is worth well worth Seeing!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Half Way There and we are Expecting???

~Oh how I hate this picture...and any pictures of my pregger self...but this was me at 20 weeks exactly (I'm even bigger now...just a week later). And yes I am super tired, between working all day long...(12 hours or more a day) and these two...keeping me up all soon as mom lays down it's a party in her tummy!

~I've been eating 5 meals a day and I was so happy to learn that I have gained 15 pounds! Yay! I was suppose to hit 20 by now...but hey for all the weight I lost in the first few VERY sick months...I'm pretty proud of myself! My goal is two healthy babies!
~Our Ultrasound showed there are still two very healthy...and active babies! Which is a huge relief for mom and dad....I always get nervous for prenatal check ups...but with is twice as there is so much that can go it is such a blessing to be healthy this far!

~And now the moment we've all been waiting for....genders! Kaylie has insisted even before the pregnancy that I would have a baby boy and girl at the same time...and our 16 week Ultrasound showed that Baby A might be a boy but we couldn't tell with Baby B due to the cord being in the way... so I was sure that Kaylie was right.
Baby A is??? ........... A GIRL!!!!
This little stinker had her fist down between her legs, so for the first part of the appointment I still thought it was a boy... then she moved her hand to prove she fooled us the first time!
Baby B is??? ......... A GIRL!!!!
~Kaylie was wrong! But she was super excited to hear she gets TWO baby sisters... and I guess that is what happens when you've got a 3 yr old praying day and night for a baby get two...whether mom and dad are trying to have a baby or not! This one took forever to get a shot of her profile (she was moving all over the place)...and here she is pushing her face up to the lining between the two sacs...I guess she's trying to get a look at her sister.
~I was a little sad that it wasn't a boy and a I had my heart set on it, but we were excited to hear that there is a small possibility that these two could be identical... depending on if they were originally one egg and split super early in the developing I guess we will see!

Bear World

Life has been super busy (especially this last week with the People Magazine's been CRAZY!!!) But with family up for the weekend we decided to spend the afternoon at Bear's literally a 10 minute drive from us, and we've never been there, but it was well worth the afternoon off, to spend time with family and our kids. Here we are in front of what I nicknamed the "Oprah Bear" no offense to just really looks her.
Kaylie striking a pose for the camera with a Bear Mask on! She's such a ham!
These are Triplet Baby Bears....(I'm fasinated with multiples right now).
Cute Story Here in this picture above:
This lil guy came up the the electric fence (as you see in the picture) and started to bite it...and it shocked him. You could hear the shock and see a spark, and this picture was right after he got shocked. He sat back on his bum, put his head down and literally sobbed! We sat and watched his shrugs and cries for a few minutes...I wanted to pick him up and give the poor lil guy a hug!
I think he felt my sympathy for him...I was about to cry for him. These triplets were so cute...I wanted to take one home even though they are a little bigger than Aaron.
This Picture only took about 20 tries...just to get Aaron to look through the hole.
Aaron, being true to his hunky self was taking time to hit on a cute lil girl about his age...
Taking his shades off to get a better look at this cutie... he is such a ladies man!
Cute lil fawn....we called him Bambi! He was so tiny!
Yes, they have rides....and this one being a car ride was a hit for Aaron.... he waited forever to ride it and of course we had to ride it at least 3 times. I can't tell you how much this lil boy loves cars, and this ride made his day!
Kaylie is such a dare devil, her cousin Brynnlee (to the left of Kaylie)was amazed at how gutsy she was.
We got to drive through the park twice, and the second time was much better. The first time was all the bears and animals were asleep. But the second time was great because the park was about to close all the bears were out waiting to be fed. This Black Bear was taking an afternoon swim and it was super fun to watch him play with and try to float on this log.
And there were tons of them....we counted at least 30 bears!
Here are a few wolves...such pretty animals!
And yes...for all those of you who have always wondered...Bear World does kind of have a "Jurassic Park" feel to it, with all the gates and electric fences. Well worth the stop especially if you miss any animals in Yellowstone!